These posts are posed as a ‘stream of consciousness’ evaluation of questions that I am asking myself.
The question I pose in the title is one that troubles me. If I were to choose a phrase that immediately ‘gets under my skin’ it is the statement from others about what ‘everyone’, or ‘someone’, ‘needs‘.
From my own sensitivity to other’s views, I’ve talked about trying to frame my comments in the arena of what I think or how I feel. I’ve learned that this is the most ‘unassuming’ and ‘fairest’ approach.
So, you may rightfully call me ‘sensitive’ to how others frame their comments. IMHO…I want to get-along and be listened to as much as anyone, but how would I know? 😉
I’ve taken exception to posts that were presented as “everyone agrees” or “everyone should” because of the pretentiousness it conveys to me.
The worst kind of statement IMHO is “they don’t need” or ‘worser’ “you don’t need” something.
I’ll admit my first internal reaction is “Who do you think you are?!” followed by the calmer, friendlier, question, “How is it that you know ‘what I need’?”
Examples of things I’ve heard are:
“People don’t need AR-15s.”
“Everyone agrees we should “Go Green”.”
“You don’t need to be that busy with your grandkids.”
“You don’t need to eat meat.”
“Everyone needs to take the “vaccine”.”
“Everyone needs to be kinder.” [IMHO… Everyone is not routinely nor purposefully unkind. So, I ask, “Are you seeing monsters that I don’t?” Should I be afraid?]
“We all need to come together.” This last one would be nice. I know cohesiveness in our communities is a wonderful thing.
IMHO…I think the first thing that would help in the ‘coming together’, is an effort by each of us to speak for ourselves and avoid telling others “What they need.”. It’s off-putting to me and may be to others. (But you don’t need to agree. LOL)
To my fellow Americans:
Our Constitution expresses to us directly that each of us have a right to pursue what we ‘need’ but not a right to tell others what they need.
*Oh, I understand that personal ‘needs’ are subjective and different from basic survival ‘needs’ which we all may pursue as ‘we see fit’.